Monday, November 28, 2016

7 things for 7 years of marriage.

Happy Monday to you..
Happy 7th wedding anniversary to my husband and I. 
7 years, 1 dog, 2 kids & 6 moves later.
It's crazy to me how fast time flies, when your in the moment it can feel like time is moving slow but when you look back on special dates like today for us it's like, wow I feel like I just blinked.

I thought I would share some advice that was either given to me or my own advice on marriage of my short 7 years. 
I also thought I would have you reminisce with me by showing you a few photos of my wedding day back on November 28th, 2009... 

Photos by Michelle Hamstra Photography 

1. Prayer. The strongest thing you could ever do as a couple is pray together. There are things that have come up where all you can ever do was pray. Pray for your marriage. It's not easy.  God knows that. Any good marriage that you hear lasting 60 plus years always has Christ at the center. 

2. Forgiveness. I cannot stress this enough. My marriage wouldn't have even lasted through the first year without the power of forgiveness. 
Forgiveness from God, your spouse, & forgiving yourself.

3. Choose to love. Our world has this so mixed up. I feel like today, its all about how you feel & what you deserve. A marriage that lasts doesn't work like that. When you say those vows in front of your friends, family, & God. You are saying I choose to love this person through better or worse. Just because you might not feel like loving one day and those feelings have diminished a little because you've gotten into an argument, that doesn't mean a your on the road to a divorce. You choose to love that person daily. It's not always a feeling but more like a decision to stick by that person day in & day out. 

4. Seek advice from older couples. I realized this at the beginning of our marriage. I would talk to my single friends about struggles we've had or arguments we've gotten into. Although they would give me pretty good advice, I got to thinking why am I not going to older couples that have probably walked this road once or twice before, that would be able to show me how they overcame the problem with their spouse. 

5.Love & Respect. If you have never read the book Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, I highly recommend it.  I will link it here. Bottom line.. Men like to feel respected and women like to feel loved. If the man doesn't feel respected than he won't show love to his wife. If the wife doesn't feel loved than she won't show respect to her husband. It's an endless cycle. 

6. Compromise. What's marriage without a little give & take. You will learn this real fast in the beginning. I'm still learning 7 years in. I thought I knew Brent before I got married but I am still learning something new each day.

7. Communication is key. This one I'm still learning so I'm not much help but I will say miscommunication is probably 90% of our arguments. No joke. I've talked with couples who have been married for 30 years and they are still working on how to communicate better. It's always a learning process. A process that is so worth it in the end. 

One more thing... Laugh together & laugh often. 
Whether it be at each other or with each other.

I wanted to remind you guys that I am not a marriage expert by any means nor do I have the most perfect marriage but I am proud of the things I've learned along the way. 
Proud enough to want to share them with you. 

I also wanted to say Thank you to my husband for sticking by me.  I don't know how you do it but you manage to make me feel like the most beautiful & important person in your life. 
I love doing this life with you. 
Here's to 7 years under our belt & many more. 



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